Monday 5 January 2015

Day 93 - Where to start.


So I started this whole sober journey at home in my own kinda rehab which involved a sofa bed and a lot of chocolate.

I moved into my sober bed, bought with my first months sober savings soon after. And, I've been in one or other basically ever since then. Often all day. Sometimes everyday. Often working, often not just reading sober stuff. I've declined a lot of parties and taken sober self care when required, often going back to bed.

Its OK for a while and as I work 7 hours a week from home, a skype convo in my bed with my job share (non video) is OK at a push.  I can write reports no bother and I'm 'present' in my job now rather than dragging myself through it.

Here's the thing, its unsustainable for me longer term. In fact its unsustainable for anyone longer term, I think.

So whilst I can give excuses like sorry no bra on today, can't come. I really need a boot up the backside or a strategy to get me on the move before gone lunchtime.

I also need to find an additional job. I might need a bra for that. And probably clothes. 
I guess in some ways its time to go back into the world, sober. And fathom out what it is I actually want to do and not overwhelm myself in the real world.

Then again I might stay in my pj's until I hear my husbands on his way back from work then frantically get dressed.

Apply motivation here please in the comment box below.
Or if you're a more direct kind of person use this!

5 comments:

  1. Sometimes, just sometimes, I find we can over think things. Maybe "just go out and do it" might be a strategy in the short term? If we wait to fathom out what we actually want to do, we might end up doing nothing at all? Seize the moment, bra or not! (I love your sober blog, can you tell? I'm on, hmm, day 107 today, and I find it so supporting to follow the progress of others.) Hugs, Do xx (just put my bra on, here)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HUGE CONGRATS for 107 days. That's fabulous and thank you for the lovely compliment

      Ha I opted for boiler suit today with no bra, sorry if TMI but I've a good supporting vest on.

      I was talking about exactly this with friends the other day.

      Proper job v p/t non-brain melting job

      I guess if I don't seize the moment and try either I'll never know.

      I think that's what I'm scared of, I think I want a proper job, I was about to take over my own department oop north. Small but perfectly formed.

      Or do I go for something less taxing on the noggin and responsibility front and hope that staves off overwhelm and keeps me sober.

      Just do it already seems like a good strategy.


      Well done for getting that bra on, mine goes on exactly a half hour after he phones to say he's leaving work when the boiler suit and the pjs come back off too and I hop in the bath first.

      :) sober wife, happy life.

      Delete
    2. OK so that didn't work, we had a PJ date instead so straight from sawdusty to sparkly in pjs. :) x

      Delete
  2. I love this! I think if staying in your sober bed and doing an untaxing job with no bra is what has been working for you, you should thank yourself for it :). You'll figure out what to do (how much more of it or whatever) as it comes. As for the bra, whose idea was it anyway? I hate the dang thing and try very hard to only wear it when I must - which is usually only when I have to go to my office (I work from home more so no bra most days) and occasionally for 'social' or kid mom stuff. But even then if it's cold enough to wear bulky sweater or similar, who really needs to know there's no bra?

    I think you're doing great!!

    Hugs,

    SR

    ReplyDelete
  3. SR you do make me laugh thank you so much. I'm usually under so many layers who'd ever know either. We call them 'over the shoulder boulder holders'. :)

    I'll figure it soon, I knew the sober stuff would be hard and take time but I also know that I need to start to 'live' a wee bit out of my bed.

    Although...........;)

    Have a happy happy day and thank you for commenting.

    ReplyDelete